Thai Nguyen once said that becoming the best version of yourself will equip you to spark change in others.

Are you in control of your life? Are you listening to naysayers? Or do you know what you want and you are going after it?

2 years ago, the pandemic hit us really hard. Some of us are still trying to bounce back. You see, life will always have adversity but the key thing is knowing how to bounce back. 

When the pandemic hit, I knew I had to keep myself occupied and I embarked on expanding my skills and  knowledge to better serve others. So, I signed up for a Life Coaching program.  Today I am a Life Coach. Going further, I have also enrolled in a Cognitive Behavior Therapy Program and the Advance Cognitive Behavior Therapy Program which will be completed soon.

You see, we get so distracted by everyday life and don’t use the opportunity presented to master our skills.

Here are 7 effective strategies for cultivating self-mastery:

1) Talk to yourself  – ( NO, you are not mad as some people would think….). This does not mean you are talking aloud, you are actually responding to the number of thoughts and questions running through your head. Make this exercise intentional. Write down your thoughts and responses to the questions. Observe your thoughts by being self-aware and self-reflective.

2) Make peace with your past – We are the sum total of experiences but that does not confined them to us. Understand the lesson being taught by the experience. Write down your concerns. This exercise may be painful, but know that it is only  through this process you can heal and grow.

3) Play devil’s advocate – Challenge your thought pattern and reasoning. This brings out a level of confidence and allows you the opportunity to develop ‘thick skin’. You would be better prepared to accept criticism. 

4) Keep a journal- This exercise allows you to write down your thoughts but it is also an indicator of your growth; how you dealt with situations along the way. It can also be your autobiography for aspiring authors.

5) Break the Bystander Effect –  Self-mastery allows for an active approach in life. It gives you the drive to do things that you want to do. Be a performer rather than a spectator.

6) Cognitive Reappraisal –  A psychological strategy. Big words………but really what I am referring to is reinterpreting  an event in a positive way and not in a negative way. Change your interpretation lens.

7) Audit yourself-  You can do this, critique yourself!  Have a honest assessment of your thoughts and your weakness. Come on… we all have weaknesses. Own up to the unpleasant side of you. Admit where there is a problem and fix it.

I hope this helps you along your life journey as you action your 2022 goals.

If you are having challenges going through these stages, reach out to me at to set up an appointment; I will be more than happy to work with you.

Now is the time, make that change and bounce back!


Published by Michelle Cockburn - Motivational Speaker

Wo.Men to Wo.Men Services reaches out to both Men and Women. We offer workshops on: Self Esteem and Self-Worth; Fear and its Impact on Self; Relationship Etiquette; Purposeful living and Customer Service Interface.

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